Today's word: boundaries

I know I am slightly weird about my whole strangers being touchy but if you have been in the situations that I have been in, you would more like see my point. Today I had a close encounter, a stranger appeared from what seemed like nowhere and stood like 2 inches away from me while I was trying to pay for coffee.

I pay and had to side step my way out of the situation. I really do wonder why people stand so close. This does not improve my mood which is already on shaky ground. Anyway I went over to the coffee stand and hear that he is buying coffee. This is an 'oh shit' moment for me because now I have to speed through coffee pouring so we don't have a repeat occurrence. I did not make it. There he was again all over me.

I quickly gathered cream and sugar and high tailed it out of there.

What should I even make of today??

Stop it you're annoying me!!

I like to know stuff, about people, place and things. Sure some might call this compelling need to find information stalking. And if it is, I pride myself in being an non-intrusive stalker. Yes I might follow your every move on the internet but I don't in turn follow it up with a message to the person that I'm inquisitive about. I must say now that someone is doing it to me and will probably some how find my blog and will read this, I say stop it you are freaking me out.

ted.

She can't help but be an ass

Ann Coulter is at it again. This time in a fight with the ladies of the view. I don't even like agreeing with them because they can be harsh.

You know we are all guilty of our stereotypical views and we shouldn't be blamed for having them initially. Truly it is the way that we make sense of the world. We would never learn anything if we didn't prejudge something then ask about it. Maybe you don't agree.

I think that everyone loves there parents both of their parents until you learn about how parents work. Maybe you don't love them because you found out that if its possible your dad should be in your life or that mothers without problems or illness don't abandon their kids. Then again that's me judging fictional people I made. I grew up knowing both my parents, pathologically loving them as a child. Despite their flaws. So with that I can't judge those who have problems with theirs.

Although that may not seems to prove my point, if you even thought I had one, Ann Coulter can not generalize that bi-racial celebrities use (or identify with) one race over another to get what they want. She definitely uses her white status to get what she wants. Until she is in the shoes of someone bi-racial supposedly who have had to use one race to their advantage she should shut it. I thought she had her jaw wired shut or at least I hoed she did.



http://www.eurweb.com/story/eur50030.cfm

She makes me so upset then i make crazy posts about what she said. I should stop this and someone should trip her.

The Analyzers

Well GenderAnalyzer thinks I'm a boy and Typealyzer called me a feeler. Well I know I don't like this one bit.

I'm a girl and I am not a feeler (creepy).


CRAP!!!!

Well Well

First off, I don't give a shit.

I would say that I didn't know what I was thinking but on second thought I know exactly what I was thinking and that was very questionable. Many of you know I sent out a slew of text messages. None of which I got answers too but I will be ok, despite the fact that no one loves me but Robby and Kim. I must say I am not nearly as drunk as I wished I was but I will say man was tonight uncomfortable. For everyone just not me.

At BBC, it's Wednesday so it's Hamburger Hell and I have a yearning to go. Robby indulged me. As I was walking to meet Robby, I thought 'I was going to take the night back'. Well that slogan is taken for a much better cause than mine. I know I torture myself (a little) but this was a bit much for me tonight.

I wish that things didn't have to be as awkward as they are but there is nothing I can do about it. You know I am polite and really really need to go to bed. I will say hi to whoever will say hi to me. I learned it's not to many people. Well whatever. You know I am a nice girl, if nothing else polite. Ask a bus driver.

The night was filled with lovely saying that I shouldn't repeat online, but the sentiment was I'm a fun time who know one likes.

My response is "I don't give a shit."

I must say this while I am in a relatively good mood. I am not upset with anyone, I don't have the time. I would like to go back to having a drama-free lifestyle. More importantly I will no matter who I have to cut out. I sick of all the bullshit and if anyone can name a time that I did something to them out a maliciousness (and if we were or are friends) sorry. There is nothing else for me to give.


I'll end this post with this:

fuckedy fuck fuck fuck, suck that.

I apparently have a lot to say

I am annoyed once again with life. You know I try to live my life in such a way that I don't have secrets and don't need any. There are things that I don't openly share because sometimes it's best not to lay all your cards on the table at once.

So one of my cousins frequently doesn't ask me to participate in activities (whether it be dinner, or out to a club or whatever) that her and some of our friends do because I on a few occasions said I didn't want to go or that I couldn't go. Its funny to me. It probably shouldn't bother me but it does. I personally like to put out the offer out there and see. If someone I invite can't make it they can't make no hard feelings on my part.

It probably shouldn't bother me but it does. Well enough bitching for this post.

I am almost at my breaking point

I have been craving Noodles & Co. Buttered Noodles. So I decided I would make some. I have made them before and they have been ok. Problem was I was hungry didn't let my whole grain noodles cook long enough. Well additionally I was using whole grain noodles instead of egg.

I also decided to do a buttered noodle recipe search. I know add butter to noodles then stir. But I have tried different things spices you know. I came across this web site with a Noodles & Co. review. On it said that the buttered noodles were the top seller and that was because most people had a lack of culinary adventure. I took offense. I don't know why exactly but I did. I like all types of food and probably have tried 65% of there menu.

I don't like mushrooms or pesto, so there. I have no clue why I am complaining.

Oh yes I do. I am sick of winter and I want Noodle & Co. brand noodles not Tamara's kitchen brand. Man I think I need a nap or something.

I think I am missing something

More and more celebrities are showing their vaginas (somehow vaginas is not a word - what's plural). Anyway Geri Halliwell from the Spice Girls showed off hers at a recent concert. At first I believed that they didn't sell celebrities underwear. Which I find to be a very bad mistake - economically. Now I think I am missing something. I can see going sans panties at home. When in public you should wear undies. I can even give some celebrities the, "I didn't have enough time to put them on after the quickie I just had", or "I just forgot", or "my assistant doesn't believe in underwear and she only wears pants" but only once.

What am I missing. I really want to understand this.

I understand vaginas are good for the internet and the porn business, but what about the rest of us that are innocently wandering the internet.

So Sad!

All I can say is I wish I was as fat as Britney Spears. Don't get me wrong I watched her perform on the VMAs and she did look sluggish but by no means fat. Man if the girl wants to wear a bikini let her wear a bikini. I don't think she looked bad until you looked into her dead eyes.

I can't believe that we still put such a critical eye on people. There are way worse things to be worried about. I guess its all about bringing other people down because you can't be happy with yourself.

The Internet and television has done it to me again

This one is going (this post) to explore one of my current pet peeves and man does this one bother me.

So I was reading the Pop Candy blog like I like to do every morning. I missed reading yesterday but that's beside the point. I came across an entry that said a Pop Candy reader made a post on her blog about David Milch, Deadwood and John from Cincinnati. That posts leads me to my anger. That people get so stuck in their ways and hate change so much that they would rather have something go on forever than letting creative change happen. I will be the first person to say that I may have some questionable choices in the things that I watch on tv. Anyway. I watched Deadwood and I watched John from Cincinnati and although I had no clue what was going on in John from Cincinnati my curiosity about what could happen and what I saw previously from David Milch kept my attention. I must say that I will give most shows 4 episodes to hook me and it maybe my own stubbornness that gets me with these types of shows (I was attracted to Lost for the same reasons).

I can also say that I have no clue how networks and production companies work but from what I seen they have little patience for a show that is not producing the results that they hoped for. I was surprised to see that an actor from both Deadwood and John from Cincinnati replied to the post, Jim Beaver played Ellsworth on Deadwood and Vietnam Joe on John from Cincinnati. His response just displayed the fact that the things you posts are for the entire internet not just your friends and family.

I think that people get so caught up in their feeling (my god its tv things changes) that they insinuate things about series to help them cope. I am just glad that actor and actresses read and speak up. Change is inevitable. Deal with it.

UGH

I go to write out my rent check. Which upsets me because I just want to pay it online.

Secondly I have 39¢ stamps. For the life of me I can't generate that cent symbol. Anyway I have know clue how much stamps cost, but if I could do the above I wouldn't need stamps.

I am full of wonderful goodness today.

Bus Stops

So I left my apartment today just missing the bus. Instead of going back home and waiting I decided to stay they and wait it out. Today pre-9am weather was weird in a way. I was standing there thinking this weather could go either way, it could get really cold or really warm. I did catch the weather today and although I am not a trained meteorologist I do just fine by going outside for a few minutes. Anyway I had a idea of what the weather would be like. I have spent to much time discussing the weather with my keyboard so moving on.

Next I am standing there staring into people's cars like I do in the mornings. You know I am slightly to nosy for my own good. Some guy driving a truck (like ups/fedex sized) decided he should yell "hey sexy". Well I can't say that I noticed that I looked really good this morning but apparently other people did. There were lots of staring and the bus driver called me sweetheart. Maybe I looked like I needed a compliment.

(as a side note: the benefits office called - they have decided that they are going to get back to me - again, thanks)

Back to the morning. Nothing wrong with liking yourself right. Its even better when other people like you too. I also saw a guy today in a really nice suit on a motorcycle. It looked a little odd but I know it happens everyday. Too bad he didn't wear a helmet. It will be such a shame if he get blood and brain matter al over that nice suit.

Oh I have two monster bug bites that have swelled. my arms look pretty weird.

ted.

Mail Inquiry

I know by the time I get my bermuda shorts it will be November and I should not get upset about this at all. I can't help myself and can feel the tension starting to build.

So I bought bermuda shorts online because the store didn't have them and I wanted the sale. They apparently were picked up in VA July 3rd. The last check point was WV today. The estimated delivery, and this is the part that angers me, is July 10th. They are supposedly shipping through the United States Postal Service. Which mean some crap-ass local shipping company probably dropped it off. Anyway 7 days including the holiday. I know I don't ship things and I'm overreacting because I can but it seems a little outrageous.

ted

So you know when your famous...

You should probably know that there are cameras everywhere. So I recently saw a picture of Rebecca Gayheart grabbing Eric Dane's crotch. Mind you he is her husband and when she wants a handful she should get a handful. The thing is that picture is much like hickeys to me. We all know you have sex, why announce it.

Its actually quite disturbing to me.

ted.

Hungry

Iam currently looking at a Jimmy John's catering menu because the last time I order they attached this to the bag. No I am not having Jimmy John's for lunch but started to look at the pictures. To torture myself mainly. Well I've had catered JJs before and at no point did it look like the picture. First of all they are cut in much smaller portions and the top portion of the bread is never cut curvy to allow space for the lettuce and mayo.

I hate when I can't find something

We all know how this works. You look and look and its in the last place you look. Duh.

Well I am looking for a website that you list what you have at home and it gives you recipes. MSN has one but I don't like it and I want the other one.

Damn that John Mayer

Well when John Mayer isn't being particularly (you wouldn't believe how long it took me to spell that) funny (on his blog, stop worrying) he is posing questions about what he thinks or feels. Now he writes that he is going to focus on environmentalism (global warming) for a while to see what happens. As a result of me reading his blog and begin to think about whether I stand for enough besides my own happiness and well-being. I am a big proponent of people seizing their own destiny and making life what they want it but like I said that is a "me" focused idea. Yes my world is a little self-centered but until someone comes along and changes my mind this is how it will be. That may seem a little contradictory but I don't have the time to fully explain what I mean.

Anyway...

I am going to do a little self-reflection to figure out if I don't balance well. You know if by thinking of myself too much I am saying "fuck the world". So I hope to report back with what I feel is important (on a grander scale) and what I am or am not doing to help the cause. I guess it is something to think about or maybe I am losing my mind.

What am I going to do with myself

So I had an interview yesterday and as you all know I need a job. The thing is it is to the point where I can't be selective in where I accept a job. Bringing me to the point of this post (if it has a point, it may not), why make the job you want someone to be dedicated to sound like such a drag. I know I will probably not find my dream job right away. I don't know what me dream job is but I do know the type of people I like to be around. The people in the HR department seemed like nice enough people. It was once I got out of the elevator the concern set in. It was depressing kind of. All the walls were white (no frills in this place). Well I sat down in the office with the business manager and the office was kind of creepy. There was a bookcase/shelf with absolutely nothing on it, not a book or a plant nothing.

I guess I am starting to get a better picture of what I want. I want to work with fun dynamic people that despite your job and no matter how much of a chore the work is you feel ok about going to work.

Annoyances

So my morning started unexpectedly early. Although I am having bizarro dreams this one not violent strange nonetheless. I am sure I am not ready to talk about it. Anyway, it had to be approximately 5:15 am when an alarm clock somewhere in the building went off. I will say I have been guilty of this particular wrong doing. Forgetting to turn off my alarm clock when I won't be home to turn it off. I have gotten much better at it though. The thing is I have been having trouble sleeping, I mean a bad bout of various forms of insomnia. It's been probably been over six months since I had a really good nights sleep. Well the thing (the alarm clock) had no owner this morning or the person in charge of it was being an ass. The thing is we have all programmed our selves to wake when that sound happens. Personally I have something called a gentle wake alarm clock that made matters even worse. It starts off with the faintest of beeps and get louder. I had my window open and this alarm sounded similar to the very first beeps of my alarm clock. Which always jolts me awake so I can turn it off. So I was awake and all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. The thing is every time I laid still I could her the beeping. I tried putting the pillow over my head even blankets nothing helped. I was not the only one that unhappy by this. The person that lives above me had some sort of violent reaction 15 minutes into it. When he started to scream and stomp around. That was less annoying because it stopped. I eventually turned my radio on so the beeping would go away and I could go back to sleep. As you all know you can not predict what will happen on the radio. It did not produce a quality sleeping environment. Not that I thought it would it sure was better that the beeping. I was over an hour of beeping. I started to get angry much like the man above me. I wanted to perform violent acts upon someone's head but I controlled myself. Just barely. I will never forget to turn off my alarm clock again.

Ready to rock out!

So I might as well get this out of the way. I am super excited about Guiter Hero II. I do believe that every home that has a PS 2 get this game. Its too bad that I don't have any pictures of guitar hero playing. I will have to get more.

Damn it I'm hungry, and Jimmy Johns is not making me freak.

Everyone that knows me know that I have an addictive TV personality. I have been staying up at night to watch tv. I need ashow or two to get cancelled because it is eating up all my free time. So there is this new show called Heroes, I don't know where it is going but I am hooked. Also I am so pissed about my new addiction to Lost. I tried my hardest to stay away from the show but then a class makes me watch it, not good is all I am saying. I have also been watching Weeds and I don't know what to say becuase I don't want to ruin it for those who haven't watched it yet. I will get back to that though.

Still not freaking.

So I saw this movie on Friday called War Tapes, I recommend it. It is just footage from soldiers in Iraq. I'll just move away from this subject now.

So I lost a book today, it was book from class. Funny because I have only been in like four different places that I could have lost it. Whatever who wants to read anyway.

I am starving, WHERE'S JIMMY JOHNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have to go I am getting to agitated to write.